Small domestic joys

There is something to be said for achieving the age, the moment in life, whatever it is, when it's the small domestic joys -- Lizzy and Hamlet napping together in the sofa while I watch "Emma" on PBS, my husband working nearby in his office with Magellan on his lap, and Darwin trying to get in some kind of trouble somewhere in the house -- that give me the most pleasure.

Of course, my profession, my scholarship, my family, and my friendships contribute a lot of happiness and wonderful challenges to my life, but it's those home-bound moments that make me feel most whole, most fortunate.

Today, while she was doing my hair, the hair stylist was telling me about how she's a single mother, raising two teenagers with no support from their father, whom she divorced when they were little. She now works full-time in the salon and attends a technical college during her early mornings and late nights so she can fulfill the pre-requisites to get into a nursing program.

"Good for you!" I said, admiring her purpose and verve.

"Some women complain that they don't have time for themselves," she said. "I have no idea what that is!"

I've worked, and still work, very hard for everything I have in my life. But there's nothing like a good reality check, like connecting with someone else who toils a lot harder for a lot less, to provide a humbling perspective that helps us be grateful for everything in our lives, including (most importantly) those things we might want but don't have.

Even the challenges and problems we face (having too much to do is a blessing compared to those who have been laid off and have no job prospects) are part of the privileges we are given.

For a long time now I've known that life isn't a dress rehearsal. And that while you might get a second chance, you should never count on a third one. That's why I want to be present in every moment of my life, and I want every minute to count. I may not remember every second I live, but my purpose is to squeeze the very last drop of joy I can until my life is perfumed with it.