Sunday, July 5, 2009

Quinceañero

On a Tuesday at 5:30 p.m., fifteen years ago on this date, my husband and I said our wedding vows, he in Spanish, I in English, in front of about 30 of our closest relatives and friends, in the gathering room of a small resort on the southwestern coast, in the tiny town of Guánica.

That day I made the best decision I've made in my entire life: to tie my destiny to the very best of men -- a grouchy, stubborn, sometimes impossible man who is simultaneously the smartest, most generous, most admirable of men. Without a doubt, he is still the best thing that has ever happened to me.

I knew he was special when, on our first date, he asked me to tell him my story, becoming the first man I'd ever been out with who was more keenly interested in learning about me than in having me hear all about him.

He's also put up with and been through some very rough times with me, through long illnesses, several operations, and not a few trips to the emergency room, where he's had to sleep on chairs. Thankfully, those painful years are behind us, but he's earned the badge of a hero in my book for sticking with me through thick and very thin, where others would've bailed out much sooner and not without reason.

What amazes me most about our marriage is that we've become closer and better with and to each other with the passage of time, and every year brings new joys and challenges that we both gladly take on together, codo a codo as the great Benedetti said in his poem. Knowing that we're there for each other to share in our successes, to point each other in the right direction when we stray, and to support each other in difficult times is part of what makes this life a blessing.

A friend recently told me that she thinks what makes our marriage so successful is that my husband and I complement each other (because we couldn't be any different in many of our tastes and preferences!), and that he is such a nice guy, too. "They don't make them like him any more," she said a little wistfully.

My husband is ultimately right that, while we are as different as a gringo from West Virginia and an island Puerto Rican can be, ultimately it's our similar values -- the knowing, or at least striving to know, what is truly important in life -- that brings and keeps us together.

Whatever it is, fate or luck or hard work (and I think it's probably all those), I'm truly thankful that 15 years ago today this man and I chose each other to spend the rest of our lives together. Here's to our quinceañero and to the many more (hopefully) to come!

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Ivonne Acosta Lespier said...
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